I should be in bed right now. Well, I am almost in bed, but I should be sleeping, or at least trying to sleep. And I was, but I couldn't. After a very long day, I should be tired, but something led me to thinking about the giddiness of being a mystified and befuddled seeker.
It's been a very long time since I've blubbered about it, but I am now. Or at least I was a few moments ago. Funny how it is…it’s just so I don't know, amazing, in a way, to think about thinking less.
My soul’s musings have come to hold much more significance. It’s an odd and cruel way of living—to bulldoze your spirit. To be sad for myself—that would be selfish…won’t it? I've gone from complaining about other people’s egocentricity to making an obscene display of my own. I'll stop.
I do truly believe that my life is better than it would be. I’d probably never know what would be of me had I made the wrong choice. And I never will know. But I'm pretty sure I'm glad that I don’t have to find out.
And back to the interest of dreams. Dreaming awake is one of the nicest ways to live. It seems dismal to live in any other way. I sure would like to dream and dream.
Now this brings a whole new meaning to the fact that I'm about to go back to sleep!
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1 comment:
mystified and beffuddled seekers. i know what you mean. words run out. words are not enough. talk is cheap. talk is cheap. talk is cheap.
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